Hello stress come on in…I’ll make room beside the elephant

The Heat is On
If you read my post Dear Mom…This is Hard you will know that I have been dealing with stress in my life for a long time. I was talking to my cousin this morning and I told her about posting the picture of us when we were 19 and I said “ahh to be young and have no worries”. Life was easy then, or at least I thought it was.
Do I do well under pressure? I’ve learned to. I have strong organizational skills from my Dad (well Mom too) so I write out lists of what I have to do. When Janet died I had many friends help me but not to the same extent now. I’ve learned how to take care of myself.
I have written in journals since Janet died and have gone through 5 or 6. This morning I sat in the cafeteria with a coffee and tea biscuit and journalled. I’m scared, worried but I also know I’m the only one here to take care of Mom so I have to hold it together. Or at least in front of her. I cry at home. I phoned my cousin’s wife who has been a tremendous help. Someone who tells it like it is with me and that’s what I need. She made me laugh about some ridiculous thing. It’s sad that I didn’t really know her husband when he was alive because he was so much older than me but I feel like I am getting to know him through her memories. I have a wonderful college friend who has been a great support too. Neither live in the same city as me but just talking to them helps a lot.
I try to do the right things…sleep (not so much but I nap in the afternoon so I do ok), eat properly. I try to remember to stay hydrated but I don’t think coffee counts?
I know that I have many people praying for me and Mom and that is a great comfort too. I have to admit I haven’t prayed. Not because I don’t believe, I just don’t know what to pray for. But I believe God knows.


2 thoughts on “Hello stress come on in…I’ll make room beside the elephant

  1. Dearest love I am honored to b mentioned in your blog thank you. I know that Wayne would be looking down on us and totally approving the connection we have made. He wanted to make this connection before your dad died and before he died. I had said I would connect with you as you had written him a letter that really touched his heart. I didn’t manage to do that as he left us far too early and I was in such a state of total grief Still am. Total panic and being so overwhelmed with very simple day to day things. I find it very spiritual that you and I have connected the way we have and I believe in my heart of hearts that it is your dad and Wayne working together in the most loving way possible. Just know you have my support. Try not to b afraid as our loving Lord will guide us all as to what we have to do and where we will b led. I’m glad I made you laugh. Call anytime. I’m always here for you. Love always sue xx

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