Treading water

Sink or Swim
Tell us about a time when you were left on your own, to fend for yourself in an overwhelming situation — on the job, at home, at school. What was the outcome?
When my Mom died I was left to fend for myself because my brother was in France for work. He didn’t get home in time to help with preparations so I had to do everything myself. What was the outcome? I did it.
Throughout this past year I have learned how to fend for myself because I didn’t have anyone. I had to rely on myself. When Janet died I had my Mom to lean on. I had more of a support system. When my Dad died I kind of withdrew a little more because I was exhausted. When Mom died I resented the fact that I had to do everything on my own. Yesterday I was watching my soap opera. A young woman was sitting beside the bed of her fiance who died and yells at God “are you having fun” because she’s had a lot of tragedy in her life. I know it’s not real life but that could be me.
When Janet died I felt like I was drowning but now I am recognizing my own strength and abilities. It doesn’t mean this has gotten any easier…I’ve just learned to cope better.
I’ve learned that she hasn’t left she walks beside me.