Janet and I had two friends that we would go for coffee with once a month (on different occasions). It worked with the three of us. After a while the dynamics changed with the one woman after Janet died. There were times when I didn’t feel like I had her undivided attention.
I still go for coffee with my other friend. It means a lot that nothing changed. We both know that Janet is no longer there but we still talk about the same things we did when we went before. She doesn’t treat me differently.
Janet and I used to sit outside in the summertime and sometimes we wouldn’t say a word. I miss going for coffee with her. I always had someone to go places with.
Now that I have lost three family members I’m a little more cautious about who I socialize with and to be honest I don’t do it often at the moment. Socializing takes more effort than I really want to expend right now. Tomorrow I’m going out for lunch and dessert with a friend of mine from college. We’re celebrating her birthday early. She and I are people that prefer one on one conversations. She is someone that I can vent to and she doesn’t judge me.
I love going to conference but I like having intimate conversations with twins. I enjoy the workshops because they are small and I get to know more about people.