IT IS WHAT IT IS

Survival
I guess you could say that this blog is about my survival. I remember after Janet died being so lost. I didn’t know who I was anymore without her. We were two individuals but we were a unit. Even now I use the word “our” when referring to class picture even though it’s mine. Twins don’t learn how to use I it’s always “we”.
I survived my Dad having cancer. Living through it was literally one day at a time. My Dad and my twin were the people that had my back and they were gone. My Mom was a support too but she was not aggressive.
I think when I moved I suddenly thought things would be easier. I believed all the people that told me you can move on. But it’s only been 7 months since my Mom died. Did I really think that I would move and I would be happy? It takes time to process that my entire family is gone. I’ve been going none stop since my Mom died and I don’t think I have really processed it. This past Mothers Day mom would have spent it with her child.
I know that I couldn’t have survived without my twin friends. I remember talking to them online and I would laugh at a time when there wasn’t much to laugh at. They were the ones who told me we never get over losing our twins we just learn to live with it. It takes time.
The title of this blog is something Mom and I said often. We couldn’t change our circumstances we learned to do the best we could.

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