Roses


Today is our birthday. I got a touching email from a long time friend who wrote “thinking of you and Janet”. I also have a twin friend who wrote Jennifer and Janet. The first birthday after Janet died mom and I went to the cemetery and put flowers on the grave. I remember writing in my journal how unfair it was. How strange it felt to be standing there on our birthday.

It’s really hard to describe what the day is like now. I wake up to emails from friends and by days end many people will have posted on my Facebook page. I’m going to get pampered for the afternoon. It’s a day where I feel special and loved. But at the same time there is an underlying sadness. It will always be OUR birthday. I’m turning 45 but she will remain 32.

Yesterday it was pouring rain for most of the day but today it is sunny. Whenever I have a sunny birthday I think that is Janet smiling down on me. I was wondering what I was going to do for dessert because I have to have cake on a birthday. Last night I found out that one of the vendors is going to have carrot cake by the slice. Nice how things have a way of working out.

Happy Birthday my bud. Love you and miss you everyday.

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