Share your world 07-27-2020

Are you a clean or messy person?
I’m a clean person (although don’t look in my spare room at the moment). Living in an apartment it’s much easier to clean than a big house.
As I have mentioned in other blog posts my twin was messy. She wore her clean clothes out of the laundry basket and when it was empty it was time to do laundry. She was a messy cook and would drip on the stove and countertops (and I would go along and wipe up after her). We never fought but this was one thing that irritated me.

If I asked you to describe yourself in five words – what would they be?
loyal, funny, stubborn, sensitive, kind

Do you enjoy being out in nature?
It depends on what what we are referring to as nature. If you mean camping in a tent on the ground with no indoor plumbing…NO WAY! Been there, done that.
I like going for walks in the spring time when buds are just starting to come out of the ground. I live near a park and have 2 trees in front of my balcony. My favourite spot at my house was sitting on the deck at night watching the fire flies.

What could you spend all day talking about?
My family

Attitude of gratitude
Last week my super phoned to check on me because she hadn’t seen me around. I’m grateful for people like that!


Today’s prompt is mouth watering and it’s so hard to write on that topic.

As of 12:01 this morning masks are mandatory in all public places indoors. So that means when you go out to eat you wear a mask in, take it off to eat and then put it back on if you need to use the restroom and when you leave. I read a comment that you put your mask in a ziploc bag in your purse and then take it out when you have to put it back on. The picture I have posted is of a dessert I shared with my cousin when we went out to eat at a fancy restaurant that I love. The presentation is beautiful, the food is amazing and the ambience is relaxing. While we are now able to eat indoors I’m not going to rush out to do so because it is about the ambience. I don’t want to have to be served by someone in a mask and gloves. At the same time fine dining restaurants will struggle because they can’t serve as many customers.
My Uncle usually takes me out for coffee and a treat for my birthday. We try to get together for coffee throughout the year. I have gone to the coffee shop around the corner to get an iced drink and treat to drink on my balcony. I think I would be ok with meeting for coffee. This is going to be our new normal for a while so I guess I will have to get used to it.
We talk so much about things getting back to normal but nothing about this feels normal. I was talking to a friend yesterday that it is all about personal choice. Many people aren’t comfortable going out to eat (myself included) while others miss the social aspect of it. We all have to respect each other’s decision. AND WEAR A MASK


I’ve been thinking about this word a lot the past few days as this would be the week of the Twinless Twins Conference in Denver CO. There are so many people that go every year that really feel that loss of not being able to go. There are probably twins who signed up for the first time and it takes a lot of courage to do that.
This morning I was watching a Facebook live video of a TT doing a memory walk for her twin. Towards the end of the video she talked about going on vacation with her twin and how she could barely keep up with her. It made me smile because although I have seen many pictures of her twin on Facebook this gave me a peek into who she was. This is the thing that makes going to conference so important because it’s the one place where we can share stories of our twins. We lose part of ourselves when our twin dies and no one else will ever understand what that feels like except other twinless twins.
I also emailed the very first twin that I met at conference. The first one I attended was not quite 2 years after Janet died and was held in Toronto. She was an unofficial greeter and I just remember how loved I felt when she gave me a big hug. She is a letter writer and so am I (as was Janet) so we exchanged a lot of letters over the years. I remember when my brother was going to be married I shared a lot of things that I couldn’t share with anyone else. She was someone who had been on this journey longer than I had and then when I went to conference 4 years ago I was the one who gave hope to a new twin.
This is one of those times when I think of the things that covid has taken away. Whenever I went to conference I would tell people I lost count on how many hugs I got. We start off as strangers but go home as friends.

Acquiring new skills

During quarantine I’ve had to learn how to use some technology on my own. In May the nurse practitioner at the diabetes clinic suggested that I get a freestyle libre. While I use Shoppers Drug Mart for my prescriptions I couldn’t go into the store and have someone show me how to do it since there just isn’t room for physical distancing. So I waited until I talked to the dietician and I put her on speaker so she could guide me through the process. The first time I have ever put someone on speaker.
The last time I went into Shoppers in the south end of the city I learned that you couldn’t use the blood pressure monitor (since they would have to sanitize it after each use). I decided I should get a blood pressure monitor. I got the instruction book out to change the date and time, set it all up and hoped that I did it right. I have what they term “white coat syndrome” and my BP goes up when I go to the Drs office.
I got a Wii Fit maybe about 6 or 7 years ago. I got it back out because I can’t use the equipment in the building. Since I live in an apartment I’m going to do the exercises which don’t require me to jump etc. When I first got my Wii about 10 years ago a friend set it up for me but I figured if I could set up my computer I could do this. I couldn’t figure out what the input was supposed to be so I literally scrolled down every one until I got the right one.
I have never thought of myself as that techie. But since I moved I have online banking, I use my debit card a lot more than cash and I’ve even used apps on my phone.
One skill I haven’t acquired is how to take a good selfie…that’s a work in progress.

Coffee shops

Today I learned that the coffee shop in Old South officially opened yesterday. While it is open you can only go in for take out since restaurants and coffee shops can only have patio dining right now. I looked up their Instagram account and found a picture of what it looks like on the inside. Very modern.

Last Friday my friend picked up some gelato on the way at the coffee shop near Blackfriars Bridge. It’s quite small and she said I don’t know how they even fit that many tables in there. In the course of conversation I mentioned that the coffee shop that used to be our regular place is now under a new name. I forget what it was before but my friend and I went once and we were not struck with it. We couldn’t figure out what to order since it wasn’t just regular coffee and it cost more than Starbucks. We both agreed that the vibe was all wrong. After that we didn’t have what I would call a regular place. We started going to Starbucks because at least it was more comfortable than Tim Hortons but it was hit or miss whether it was really busy or not.

The thing that I have noticed with most of the coffee shops in the city is that they are no longer that neighborhood place. So if you are that person that just wants a regular coffee chances are you’ll just go to Tims. One downtown has boxcar donuts. Another one has cruffins.

Last fall I happened upon a post on Facebook about the coffee shop that is literally around the corner from me (picture posted). So my friend and I went. We both really liked it because it’s large. There was hardly anyone else in the place at the time we went but it has space for people at benches, tables and even couches at the back. Even though it’s very modern (since it’s in part of a new condo building) it still feels like a neighbourhood hang out. They have games on the tables. During the winter they had yoga classes on Sundays, a book club and I think they had a game night for another group. I have been a few times since it opened back up and it was quite busy. I will admit that having a coffee shop so close is probably a little too convenient! I don’t know what that magic thing is that makes a coffee shop feel “right” but this one definitely has it.

A sign

This afternoon I finally got together with a friend who I hadn’t seen since February. We were going to go to the cemetery but it’s 40 degrees outside today. Today is the anniversary of my Dad’s death. The coffee shop down the way now has gelato so my friend picked up some on the way. Unfortunately it being really hot it was kind of drippy by the time she got here. She knocked on the door and I ran to get a paper plate to put it on so it wouldn’t drip on my carpet. We sat across from each other although this is the way we usually do so that wasn’t different. She did have a mask on so while it was great to see her there is always that thing in the back of your mind. I cleaned my apartment and put out a separate towel for her to use so we wouldn’t be sharing one.

I had my grocery people pick me up some red roses at the grocery store that my Mom and I always went to. I also needed a few food items that I had run out of. I had put the vase in the middle of the table so I had to put it off to the side so we could see each other. In the course of conversation I mentioned how Dad was frugal and that he would probably think of buying flowers as an extra. Somehow we got talking about ubereats and my friend said your Dad would be rolling over in his grave knowing you did that. Oh yeah the idea of getting Swiss Chalet delivered…oh the horror. I think we all have our parents voice in our head.

This afternoon a twin friend posted the song “In the Garden” sung by Anthem Lights. I sat there thinking wow I don’t believe that is a coincidence since it is the song that my Mom chose for my Dad’s church service. We had a discussion with Dad about what he wanted since he was dying of colon cancer. I had to leave the room for part of it because it’s so hard. He told us he didn’t care what we chose. For Mom it was easy because the garden was his domain (other than his workshop). He couldn’t wait until it was warm enough to go outside and work in the garden. In the eulogy I wrote about him going outside to work in the garden on Sunday. Did I mention that Dad had very strict rules and working on a Sunday was one of them. So I asked him how come you get to do work on a Sunday? “That’s not work that’s puttering”. And everyone laughed. That was my Dad too…he had an answer for everything. To him it wasn’t work to do something that you loved.