This week did not start off well but it’s Friday and I have 2 deliveries to look forward to.
On Tuesday I ordered 2 dresses and some housewares from the new Jillian Harris/Joe Fresh line. The salad bowl that I was using cracked so I lucked out on this one. I also needed a new tumbler and the napkins were just too cute to pass up. Can you tell I like yellow? I love eating outside in the summer so these will get a lot of use. I wanted to get the white scalloped tray for my bedroom to keep my side table neater but they are all out online. Hoping I can get my grocery lady to get one in store since they use Superstore.
I also ordered 2 dresses. The yellow dress reminds me of my grad dress when I was 14. I don’t have many occasions to wear a dress but my birthday is coming up so I think I’ll wear it then. Plus it has pockets. My new blue purse would look great with it.
Today is my bakery delivery day. I actually couldn’t remember what I ordered although I did know banana bread. For me it’s comfort food and I needed it.
Today I found out some more information regarding what I wrote about yesterday. I won’t go into details but it’s interesting in this day and age how people don’t realize what can be accessed online if one knows where to look. In my entire life I have never been someone who just believed what someone told me because they said so unless it was my parents. It comes back to the title…don’t underestimate me. I’ve lived a lot of life in the past 16 years and I don’t trust as easily.
A friend of mine talks about how I love deeply despite everything that has happened to me. How I find things to be thankful for. It’s because of all that I have lost that I have to think of all that I am thankful for.
I have had so many people who didn’t think I was capable because I am a woman. I’ve learned to do things on my own because in life I was the one I could count on. I have groceries delivered, I have supers who help. I buy items online even if I have to pay for shipping. I will ask for help…IF I NEED IT.
In my life I have had many people…ok mostly men…who have underestimated me because I’m a woman. I hate it. When my Dad had cancer I was the one who looked up information online and asked questions when I went to the Drs office with him. My Dad also taught both Janet and I to use the lawn mower. I had to trim the hedges. I didn’t do it well but I could do it. He took great pride in providing for his family and he me up with an investment account. Was he also controlling…yes…but he taught me enough to know what I was doing.
When Mom died all of the people that my brother and I met with talked to him before they talked to me even though I was the one who had all the legal stuff. The lawyer that looked after finalizing the sale of the house was practically gushing.
On Friday I found out that my financial advisor decided to go to another bank. While I understand it happens it left me with a huge decision of what to do. I did what I always do and asked advice from someone I trust. In life I have learned to trust my gut. That NO is a complete sentence. That doing the right thing for me isn’t always easy but this morning I felt like a weight had been lifted and it felt good.
Yesterday I went to a mall near me to run some errands. I got in the elevator with a friendly older lady that lives in the building and we were both complaining about how cold it was. They have turned the heat off in the building but the past couple of nights it’s gotten down to 5 degrees Celsius overnight. Because of the construction downtown I was waiting quite a while for a cab. He gets to the end of my street and the bridge is closed due to construction so he had to detour which takes us way out of our way. To use the word of the day from another blogger our city planners are “asinine” because you can’t go anywhere without construction right now.
Once I got to the mall I had a very productive morning. I got some travel sized toiletries for a mini vacation/get away in July. I replaced my lost points card. Because it’s a seniors mall they do have cashiers on although they do have self-serve kiosks as well. I’m not a fan of them! I renewed my library card. I actually haven’t used it since before covid but I’m going to get some books out to take with me or read on my Ipad so I want to make sure it’s current. Finally I went into Bentley (a purse and luggage store) to see if I could find a small purse. The trouble is that cellphones are so large it’s not easy finding a purse that will fit it. I found a cute robins egg blue wrist wallet (that also has a crossbody strap) that had 2 compartments and it just fit my phone. If I’m just going to the coffee shop I only need my phone, keys and a debit card. The purse was also 30% off.
I’m actually looking forward to June this year. It’s been a long time since I’ve been able to make plans. It’s never going to be an easy month but having things to look forward to helps.
Growing up, were you closer to your mother or father, or was it a balance of both depending on the circumstances?
I was definitely closer to my mother. I remember my Mom telling me when my Dad’s siblings were over when we were young and we gave Mom a kiss goodnight before we went to bed. They wondered why we didn’t give Dad one. Dad just wasn’t demonstrative in showing love. We grew closer when he had colon cancer because I had to help him. I also knew that time was precious so I told him I loved him.
What was your favourite toy as a child, and do you still have it?
I have Janet’s. We got Bert and Ernie dolls when we were 5 for Christmas. Janet loved hers so much the arm fell off. I was going to get rid of it but my Dad told me to keep it (and he wasn’t that sentimental).
Did you have any secrets?
What did you want to be when you grew up, and are you anywhere close?
I remember somebody telling me that she was surprised that I have a blog because Janet and I were so quiet. That “quiet, conscientious” girl that teachers wrote about does not exist anymore.
I have been thinking a lot about family connections since I learned of my Dad’s eldest brother passing. I was talking to my cousin by email yesterday and we both said that it is so nice to be able to talk about things with each other. To be able to share the stories. When Mom died I no longer had someone who had the same experiences as me. When I went out to lunch with her son last Christmas I was looking at photos from a cousin’s wedding in 1985. He wasn’t even born yet. It’s weird to think he has no idea who any of these people are.
I was talking to my Dad’s younger brother’s widow yesterday. She is the last remaining “elder” in the family. I was sharing that a second cousin of mine recently had a baby but she didn’t know who she was. Mom was the one who knew all the birthdays, anniversaries etc. I did notice in the obit that both his grandsons weren’t married even though I know one was engaged. Our connections are now through Facebook and we find out information from photos or status updates. Rarely do we actually take the time to have a conversation on Messenger. For most people social media is just showing an edited portion of our lives.
When my Mom died I received a couple of condolences by email and one on the funeral home’s website. For years Mom sent out Christmas cards to everyone and it’s sad that these family members couldn’t take the time to write a note. At the same time if we had a funeral they all would have shown up.
I don’t have many family members left that I have contact with but the ones I have are quality.
This morning I received an email from the wife of my Dad’s eldest brother that he died on the 16th. While it is a sad day for his family for me it brings with it many different emotions. When my Dad had cancer he involved himself in things that should have been kept to our immediate family. We had words and Mom and I were pretty well out of the family from that point on. We were different because we faced our grief head on while Dad’s family buried it by never talking about their feelings or the people they lost. If Mom was here she would send a card because it’s the right thing to do but I don’t even know what that is anymore. I may send a donation.
There are many good memories. I posted a photo from a wedding where all of the siblings are together. They had a wall in their upstairs hallway full of family photographs and every year when they would have a family dinner they would take another photo. I grew up with their daughter. Their grand daughter is 4 years younger than me. I had many of his grand kids as friends on Facebook but we rarely ever talked so I took them off. I haven’t talked to many of my cousins since my Dad’s funeral almost 14 years ago.
Today is also the anniversary of my cousin’s death 15 years ago. While it’s a sad day I remember two people who were loved by their family.
A woman I follow on Instagram was at a launch party for a clothing line associated with Reitmans. I’m pretty sure the last time I went into the store was to buy something for Mom for Christmas. It used to be a go to place to buy pants but like many store their sizing changed. While I liked the bright colours many of the outfits were crop tops with matching skirts or pants. I just don’t know that many people that are comfortable showing that part of their body. I replace some t-shirts every summer and I always have a hard time finding ones that are long enough. Why do they stop at the top of your pants?
To save money I’ve been using Ubereats delivery service for groceries. While it works out well for getting everything that I need the “issue” comes when they try to buzz in. For security reasons our building has 2 intercoms. The outside one is for after hours and has a note attached to tell people. Unfortunately almost every delivery person uses that one and I have to tell them to go inside the building. I actually had a package from FedEx returned to sender because I could not get them to understand that we have 2 intercoms. Most of the time the supers are around and they just let the people in.
Monday is usually cleaning and laundry day for me. After taking out some recycling I came back up to my apartment to collect some items to put in the box for the food bank. I was glad to see that despite the rising cost of groceries there were quite a few bags in the box. I posted it on Facebook because I think we all need the reminder that there is good in the world.
On Wednesday I renewed my health card online. Since I don’t drive I have a Photo ID card. I had to enter in the 2 separate numbers on the front of the card. The second one was so small I was guessing what the number was. Thankfully they give you a couple of tries. I got it on the second guess. To save money the provincial government no longer sends out reminder notices for renewal by mail but you can sign up to get a reminder by email. According to the website it’s supposed to be 60 days before and then another 30 days but I never got one. It renews the month of your birthday so as long as you know the year you’re good. I’m glad I get to keep the photo for another 5 years because it was a good photo…well as good as ID photos can get.
Yesterday I decided to have my lunch at my favourite coffee shop/cafe near me. At noon it was 23 degrees Celcius which is the perfect summer temperature. I was surprised to see all of the patio tables empty when I walked past. It was fairly empty inside. When I was waiting in line the barista called me by name and asked if I ordered ahead (since I usually do). She even knew my usual summer drink order. This cafe is more expensive but it’s definitely worth it to me to go to a place where I am valued as a customer. There is another coffee shop on the corner of my street which I haven’t checked out yet. It’s quite small so I’ll probably get something to go. They don’t have a website with their menu so I had to enlarge a picture from Instagram.
I ordered a couple of things from my local bakery. With the cost of groceries there won’t be “extras” to honour Mother’s Day this year. I’ll get flowers in June for our birthday.
Do you feel comfortable walking in your neighbourhood at night?
Not at all. Honestly, there are sections of downtown that are not safe to walk in during the day as a single woman. Like many cities we have issues with homelessness, crime and boarded up businesses.
When you shop for day to day things, do you pay by cash or card?
I use a debit card for almost all of my purchases. I try to make sure that I have cash for emergencies.
When was the last time you dressed up for a special occasion?
Christmas. I bought the top to wear for 2021 but with covid cases still high we ended up cancelling. It had been 3 years since I went out for dinner so I decided to get really dressed up. My upstairs neighbour said I looked very Christmassy.
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